Just what we needed, a new strain of nationalism – the vaccine kind | Marina Hyde

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It’s a tribute to the ingenuity of the human spirit that the UK and the EU can still come up with new sources of bitter dispute

How are you enjoying the vaccine wars? The EU’s meltdown at the UK is one of those rows that turns you into the grimace-face emoji. I’ve now held that expression for three straight days, presumably along with the other 500 million-odd citizens who just want to get home but whose parents are fighting on the pub floor. Guys … please? PLEASE.

There is a true coach-crash quality to the EU’s reaction to being outfoxed by the UK on vaccine procurement. The commission’s pram has been dramatically emptied of all its toys. It’s like watching an endlessly patient and mild-mannered social studies teacher finally lose it and head-butt a pupil for beating him in a quiz. Oh, sir … I appreciate you’ve had to deal with some awful behaviour from this particular individual over the past few years, but I’m afraid … this is not acceptable. Time to put your corduroy jacket, your peace lily and your idealism in a cardboard box and make the final journey out of the staff car park. Right after the policeman has held your head down so you don’t bang it while being helped into the back seat.

Marina Hyde is a Guardian columnist

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